Tonight, as i type this post...even the music of Dire Straits playing in my headphone is finding it difficult to give me any type of comfort. This is something rare, cause music rarely betrays anyone. Tonight, it is different, because the clock shows the time is past 12am, its his BIRTHDAY, it is Sam's Birthday.
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| Sam, during our last party in Vikas. |
Sam, or Samanyoya Kulari, his original name, was as strange as his real name. He was of the kind which is impossible to ignore and impossible to hate. Our friendship developed during those 2 years in Vikas, from where we passed our High School, and those 2 years were enough to make us very good friends. The fact that Vikas was a place where friends were the only thing you prized most and needed most, made it easier to develop that bond among us and many other guys and resulted in a friendship that will last long enough, longer than us i guess.
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| All smiles, before separation! |
The best part about our very own Oriya Stud Sam, that forced me to dislike him for the first time, was his attitude towards everyone. No matter how much a guy pissed him off or how good a guy was, his attitude was same towards them. His approach was different only towards his close ones, his close friends. I mean he seriously didn't knew how to hate buggers and big assholes. I was actually kinda envy of him, i seriously could never behave normally with someone i hated the most. That's why i didn't really liked him at first, but later when i came to know him completely, i understood that it was his nature, it was his attitude to not let others guide his senses, which was actually pretty good, something which we all lack. He meant it when he said "why should my mind even think of someone who is even more useless than a used matchstick".
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| During our semi reunion in 2008(Jamshedpur) |
There was nothing that came in between us, once i understood him. You ask everyone who knew him, for some he was a "love guru", for some he was a "chill guru" and for some he was a true friend...for me, he was that part of my life, which taught me some important lessons of life that no textbook or teacher could ever teach me.
He was a good student, a very bright student, not that it matters, but it needs a special mention. He was the reason i started hating DEATH so much, he was the beginning of the realisation inside me what a cruel thing death was, how we can't control our lives, how our life still has to move on without the ones we love, how difficult it is to lose something you can't replace! His and a few more precious lives that i lost, led to this
poem i wrote a few months back on death.
Sometime, during my second year in college, in 2009 i guess...one rare day when i forgot to take my cell phone to class, when i returned back from the class, i saw around 20-25 missed calls and a dozen texts, some asking and some telling me about Sam's death, he was in college only that time. I remember my first reaction was that it must be a joke, i mean how can it happen out of nothing. They said he met with a Bike Accident last night and i started to think that the news was real once i talked to Bunty(a close common friend) but he was also not 100% sure that time but soon, after a couple of more calls, it was confirmed, Sam was not with us anymore. My mind started racing, thinking of how we met in Vikas and then i suddenly realised that we chatted online (thank you Gtalk) the very night before his accident and i logged in to my Google account and i read it for about 20-30 times continuously. It was impossible to convince my mind and heart that Sam was dead, like i didn't wanted to believe he was dead, like i wanted to change everything.
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| Enjoying...was so good! bunty, sam and me :) |
All said and grieved, you feel life is such a bitch, when looking back in time you see that, no matter how much you cried, no matter how much you cursed everything, no matter how much you wished for this world to end, this life goes on, you move on with those pains and you live, you are forced to a lifetime imprisonment to life, and that sucks, more than anything else.
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| Memories!!! |
Life, You Suck!!!
